Election years tend to bring out the worst in people. Be it through zeal or worry or something in between, every modicum of civility is easily replaced with disdain and derision.
Politics often feel personal – we crave what’s best for our country; we long for the good of our family. But as Chesterton once penned: “The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him.”
A couple years ago I got into a dispute regarding the sanctity of life. It got heated, and without thinking, I blurted out a frustrated “you have no idea” statement. Regret immediately followed. Disturbed by the jargon of my peer, I let my own emotions – and ego – get in the way and thwart what could have been a fruitful discussion. But instead of defending the truth, I was mean.
Father Gabriel of St. Mary Magdalen writes in “Divine Intimacy”: “Those who rush headlong into action, without taking precautions, will soon lose their calm, become agitated, unable to recollect themselves, and their activity will become ever more and more absorbing and demanding.” I rushed into debate; I lost my calm. My focus was on my frustrations rather than the good I intended to uphold. Chesterton would not have been impressed.
“Love is patient; love is kind” – 1 Corinthians 13:4.
While the “Be Kind” mantra may feel hackneyed, the necessity of the sentiment is not. Kindness isn’t simply being “nice.” Nice is enjoying a cup of coffee from your favorite mug, or donning a bright, comfy sweater on a rainy day. It’s pleasant and sweet, but there’s no significant moral depth.
Whereas kindness audaciously challenges us to go deeper. It doesn’t go along to get along. It actively chooses what is good, what is charitable. It sees another and delights, saying “how good it is that you exist.” Kindness is the fire lit at the heart of the home warming every room.
Nice requires little effort, but kindness, flowing from Christian charity, takes some work. It’s the “love of neighbor, grounded in the love of God” – “Deus Caritas Est,” 20.
Being kind reminds us that everyone we encounter has a cross to carry. We are all pilgrims here on earth, and the road is rough. We should desire that the companions we encounter along the way reach their ultimate destination: Heaven. And we should ask ourselves, are we helping people reach that destination or are we leading them farther away from it?
Being kind is about choosing others before ourselves. It’s not motivated by a need to be esteemed, but out of true love and generosity for another. It’s about being a friend rather than looking for friends.
And instead of being reactionary, crass, and angry, it’s receptive.
It’s important to arm ourselves with kindness when the world around us is chaotic. And the way to do that is by first growing in love of God. Offering our days to Him, and turning to Him when we feel attacked, frustrated, or scared about the political state of things.
“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle” – attributed to Plato.
Yes, it takes strength to be tender in a bitter world. It takes courage to be gentle when our political jargon is so shockingly cruel (and crude). But when we pause and remember that our goal isn't simply to destroy what we hate, but rather to safeguard and build upon what we love, we can then begin to see others as our brothers and sisters, rather than talking points to obliterate.
This November, before casting our votes, let’s root ourselves in charity and choose kindness.
By Ann Burns, a wife and mother, and founder of The Feminine Project, www.feminineproject.com.
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